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Day Six: I love it when a plan comes together

22 Nov

I’m not a planner. I never have been. I’m actually really lucky that I’m with Meg, because Meg can plan for things. For instance: a couple weeks ago, I went on a business trip for a week. I was scheduled to fly out on Sunday, and I didn’t bother to look at when the flight departed until Saturday. I forgot to do laundry, so I just loaded a plastic bag full of dirty clothes and crammed it in my duffel bag. I planned on doing laundry right away when I got to Durango. Instead, I just said “screw it” and took my clothes to a dry cleaner.

I had a razor-sharp crease in a pair of jeans for two weeks.

I tell you this story because you need to understand- if I can barely take the time to look up when a flight leaves for work, planning meals, which I already don’t care about,. is one of the most mind-numbing experiences of my life. I have actually gotten decent at planning meals the day of the meal in question, but anything beyond that is just a wing and a prayer.

This has been my solution up until this point: buy a whole bunch of shit that I don’t need, and hope that I will use it in some kind of recipe before it expires or goes bad. Since Meg and I only have one car, and she usually has roller derby practice, it’s up to me to figure out the majority of dinners. I can’t usually go to the grocery store because I’m incredibly lazy as soon as I get home and, as we’ve already ascertained, I don’t preplan for the ride home. This usually leads to one of two things: crappy chicken burritos, or eating out. If it’s just me at home (if Meg’s out of town or eating dinner with derby girls or whatever), then I’m good. Open the fridge, smell around for something not rotten, and eat it. If there’s nothing that isn’t rotten, find out which thing is the least rotten and eat that. Done and done.

Crock pots are rad, but usually require preplanning. The one exception is the greatest meal on the planet for lazy assholes, and one which I have memorized because there are FOUR INGREDIENTS:

Pollo Colorado

Chop up two yellow onions and two red bell peppers. Put them in the crockpot. Put in 2-3 frozen (I DON’T EVEN HAVE TO THINK ABOUT DEFROSTING!) chicken breasts, and cover that with a big can of red enchilada sauce (15 oz I think). Cook it on low for like 6 hours, or on high for two then on low for an hour or so. It makes a really good stew if you chop or shred the chicken, or you can remove the chicken and make fajitas or something. Done.

Anyway, the point of all this is that I need to get a better system going. Right now, we have to go to the grocery store like every day, which I can already tell is wearing thin on both of us. If I can get to the point where I can plan for two days, I will consider that a win. Maybe, in time, I will become some kind of incredible planning machine that is able to plan for a week at a time, buy everything on Sunday, and perfectly use every ingredient purchased come the following Sunday morning. That will not happen soon. I promise you that.

Today (okay, I’m writing this after the fact. I told you- not a planner) we ate:

Cereal and coffee
Sandwiches (we’re trying to cut out cheese, which I’m super excited about)
Fried chicken that Meg made for dinner
Butterscotch cookies that Meg made to try to warm up our freezing cold house while the heat was out
Beer

Any crazy awesome ideas to help me plan? Bring it on!!

-Denny

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Holy tapdancing Jahweh, that’s a lot of money.

17 Nov

My name is Denny, and I was roped into this BS by my wife. There I was, happily tossing off Hamiltons like my name rhymed with…um…Schmitty Schment, when my special lady friend randomly decided to start a blog in which we don’t spend money at restaurants.

I do this with my stacks when I go to the Olive Garden

What. The. Eff.

Just kidding.

I was pretty on board with it when she told me. I just needed the proper catalyst to get me going. We’ve talked about doing something like this for a long time, and when she texted me this:

We’re eating in for 30 days. For real. Challenge time.

…something just clicked. I don’t know if it was the take-charge attitude she had, or the fact that I tend to barely scrape by every month, having to rely on back-alley handies to make ends meet that motivated me more, but I’m motivated, partner.

So: I decided last night, during the first meal made at home (crappy chicken burritos, by the way), that I would need to get everything out on the table. I need to tell you all how much fucking money I spend on coffee and turkey club sandwiches.

I make a habit out of ignoring how much I spend. I do a great job at getting incensed at the price of gas, since I take public transportation, or the amount I spend on dietary supplements for the dog. I am not, however, good at looking at my bank statement and realizing how much I spend on eating out at restaurants, drinking out at bars, and coffeeshops.

No more. It’s time to lay it all out on the table for the two people reading this blog post. Get ready to have your friggin’ minds blown, people.

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